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Fleur Susannah

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Cars I have known [May. 9th, 2007|07:54 pm]
Fleur Susannah
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[mood |uncomfortableuncomfortable]
[music |Jarvis Cocker Album]

A friend recent told me that I own 'the most student car I know'. I guess my Claude does fall into the category of 'student' quite neatly really. Tiny, over 15 years old, two seats and decorated with stencil art. In addition to this, the left side has been smashed into so and you can't unlock that door from the outside and the socket for the passenger's seat belt has been mauled by a Labrador and is barely functional.

This got me thinking about some of the other cars I have known which fit into the category of 'student'.

Cheyney's Car, 'Baby'

It takes a while to get used to driving 'Baby'. The most difficult aspect of 'Baby' is the gears. How do I explain this? They are sort of out of alignment. When you think you are in 'reverse' you are actually in drive and 'drive' is actually 'neutral' and so on and so forth. When you are used to it all is merry and Cheyney doesn't even notice this little oddity of Baby's, just like I forget I have one door smashed in until someone has to try and get in.

Hannah's Car, 'Maisy'

Now this is one car I absolutely hate to drive, mostly because it randomly stalls at traffic lights. In addition to this, Maisy has also developed another oddity: her right indicator will not work in conjunction with the headlights. Bloody annoying when driving at night, I can assure you. Sometimes when I am doing a right hand turn across a well lit inter-section I turn off the headlights completely and other times I alternate between the two options.

James' Car, which remains nameless

Now, in the race for Number One Student Car, James' must surely lose a few points because people still try to break into it so it must look in better shape then it is actually in. Thanks to numerous break-in attempts, the locks have been well and truly fucked. Now the only way to unlock the damn thing is to climb in through the boot and unlock it from the inside. In addition to this a 10 cent coin was dropped into the steering wheel. Consequentially, the horn goes off randomly when you turn left. Sometimes it produces a short, sharp beep and other times it continues to sound until you punch it really, really hard.

I must also mention the car which James owned before his grandparents gave him his current gem. Its locks had also been destroyed, so much so that you could unlock it with a 20 cent coin. James actually found this very useful for when he was being a pizza delivery boy: he would leave the car running with the keys still in the ignition whilst he took the pizza to the door and would then re-enter the car by means of a coin.

So, I hand it over to you, kids. Which car gets the title of 'Most Student-ish Car'? My 'Claude', my housemate Cheyney's 'Baby', my sister Hannah's 'Maisy' or either one of my ex-boyfriend's gems? Or, alternatively, do you know of a car which is more deserving of the title? Tell me.

[User Picture]From: ikona_rakasha
2007-05-09 11:18 am (UTC)
My first car was called 'the peanut'. it was old, brown and slightly crunchy in its fuel lines, just like peanut butter. i loved my peanut, until i accidentally let it roll down a hill and it smooshed. Ah, to be a leaner again.

The peanut could only go up to 2nd gear, had a horn that would honk when you hit the brakes and the radio tuned on at weird times. the seat was stuck so far away i had to slide off the seat to brake. The windows on the left side were garbage bags!

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[User Picture]From: reulf
2007-05-10 07:36 am (UTC)
I think you may win.
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[User Picture]From: _sabik_
2007-05-09 11:46 am (UTC)
The indicator and headlight thing sounds like it might be just bad earth; easily fixed with a piece of wire, if it is...

(Usually this sort of thing happens on trailers — all the lights work fine individually, but not if you use them all at once.)

Of course, "add one wire (or half a dozen), rinse, repeat" can also add to a car's character :-)

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[User Picture]From: rhyannonf
2007-05-09 12:37 pm (UTC)
Apparently, the round part in the middle of the steering wheel should come off, thus the 10 cent piece can be removed. But this is second hand information. I can't guarantee it will actually work.

What is happening about your car and the damage?
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[User Picture]From: reulf
2007-05-10 07:37 am (UTC)
I've been paid out but I'm not going to repair him for now. I can live with him like that so I'm saving the money for if something else goes wrong with him.
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[User Picture]From: rhyannonf
2007-05-10 10:36 pm (UTC)
Okey dokey...
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[User Picture]From: underwearclaire
2007-05-09 02:28 pm (UTC)
James' unnamed car has to get the winning vote from me, mainly because the coin-left-hand-beep thing actually made me laugh out loud when I read it. But yours has the stencil... I haven't seen this stencil (what is it?), but I'm sure it's awesomenul, and it definitely bumps it up in the rankings.
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[User Picture]From: reulf
2007-05-10 07:39 am (UTC)
The stencils are from photos of mine from the Glam Rock Shoot. Eleanor is on one side and Chloe is on the back. They look incredible as stencils!

I love James' car. I was with him when the coin got lost and gosh it was funny. :D
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From: jickle
2007-05-09 03:08 pm (UTC)
http://jickle.livejournal.com/358965.html My sister is two today. Please leave her a birthday comment!
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From: the_van_dyck
2007-05-09 03:26 pm (UTC)
The winner is my friend Andrew's car called Donkey.It's an orange van from the early 70's with open wiring all over the front seat, no seatbelts in the back(which is covered in stickers and glow paint), suspension from hell, a rainbow rug over the windows and a bubble machine.
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[User Picture]From: reulf
2007-05-10 07:57 am (UTC)
That is pretty good. I think Klair's 'peanut' may be the winner though.
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[User Picture]From: simma14
2007-05-10 12:49 pm (UTC)
Man a lot of the weird things i say end up on the internet!!!! Claude is a fantastic little car though. Goes for a million miles on the smell of a dirty rag, all i have to do i make sure my knees don't hit the gear shift :)
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[User Picture]From: reulf
2007-05-10 01:25 pm (UTC)
He is awesome. He makes me happy and, as Paul unintentionally said today, 'he is Fleur incarnate'. I laughed at his terrible pun.
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[User Picture]From: simma14
2007-05-10 01:28 pm (UTC)
oh my god that is terrible, looks like he has the dad joke gene as well
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[User Picture]From: reulf
2007-05-10 01:29 pm (UTC)
He didn't even notice what he had done until I laughed alot AND pointed out exactly what he'd said.
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